Wednesday, January 28, 2009


"The entire world is a ...collection of memoranda that she did exist and that I have lost her."
from Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Praise for "Air and Simple Gifts"

I don't like to think of Laura missing things happening in life in the world around us now so I don't often have (or want to have) the agonizing thought: "this particular thing I wish she could have seen or heard."
Most things I rationalize are not so unique that she didn't witness some other version of it in her life. Up to now the only thing that fell outside my rationalization net in these last two years was the Opening Ceremony to the Beijing Olympics. The drummers. The drummers. She would have really liked that and that whole Opening Ceremony.
Inauguration Day yesterday. Had that same kind of thought during the playing of "Air and Simple Gifts." Laura would have enjoyed the synchrony of the musicians and their joy, their clothing ruffling in the wind in the cold and bright air. In the months before her death, on long car rides, to and from CHOP, Laura would ask for the Yo Yo Ma CD to be played. It was a Silk Road Ensemble CD that we listened to, the Distant Green Valley the track she wanted to hear.
Had that thought again hearing "Air and Simple Gifts." She would have liked this. And so I invite you to listen again and see and hear the joy of the musicians as I think Laura would have.(click on the in text link in the preceding sentence to get to a youtube video of it.)

Tuesday, January 20, 2009



Happy Inauguration Day!
Suse and I were this close to Obama one year ago during the NH Primary campaign. We were packed in with the throng in the Nashua NH high school gym on the front line to greet Obama who was surrounded by the many Secret Service agents visible in this photo (our photo but we are not in the photo.)

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Saturday, January 10, 2009

"The meadow mouse has slept in his snug gallery in the sod, the owl has sat in a hollow tree in the depth of the swamp, the rabbit, the squirrel, and the fox have all been housed. The watch-dog has lain quiet on the hearth, and the cattle have stood silent in their stalls. The earth itself has slept... But while the earth has slumbered, all the air has been alive with feathery flakes descending, as if some northern Ceres reigned, showering her silvery grain over all the fields." -Henry David Thoreau from A Winter Walk

Wednesday, January 7, 2009


Ice storm last night. All vegetation, cars, anything outside was encased in ice. Didn't get warm enough today for the ice to go away. Driveway is a sheet of ice - with water on top from today's rain. Have new assignment at work-very intensive with demanding schedule. Not much to say right now since quite tired!

Friday update: Last night owls were calling, one very close by to another further away. It is the time of year for that. And a good time to remember a favorite book of Laura's, Owl Moon. There's a copy in the Rockaway Valley School library, donated by us in her memory. Will listen for the owls again tonight. That song from the 1970's, Wildfire, comes to mind; "There's been a hoot owl howlin' by my window now for six nights in a row..."

Soon will do my 2008 "Hall of Angels" on Laura's Caringbridge site ...

Photo: Branches of Japanese Maple tree in our yard encased in ice. Cover of Owl Moon by Jane Yolen(click on this link and watch the owl!)

Sunday, January 4, 2009



Before Griffiths Pond iced over there was a swan there for a few days swimming with the buffleheads. This was before Christmas. The swan is gone now. It reminds me of the loss of someone so beautiful so important to me that the world seems forever dimmed without her.
Been trying to keep very busy working around the house. Made a small dent in the basement but that's all it will be-back to work tomorrow! Think about Laura all the time. Sifting through papers, today I found a list of flower names she wrote out: "lavender, glory bush, jasmine, rosemary, coreopsis, violets, thyme, wisteria, bluebells, trumpet vine, sunflower, cosmos, coneflower." I think she was suggesting them for our garden or they were ones she liked. It's like finding a little blueprint by Laura.

There were many neuroblastoma angels last year. Many I have not met or known of for it has been over 2 years since Laura passed away. Eden Adams became an angel a few days ago. Though we did not meet, I think she was also at CHOP around the time we were in 2006.
Eden was one of the children who was present at the signing of the Conquer Childhood Cancer Act. If you look in Eden's blog and scroll down there is a picture of her I especially like where she is sitting by a bonfire. Rest in peace, sweet Eden.